May 2013
9 posts
iwillpretenddontknow asked: Hey, Had The hat day song from business: the animated series: Live action: the Musical stuck in my head today and Just wondering , do you have any plans to do another Business spinoff in the future? or any projects with wade in general cause you two are hilarious together.
Anonymous asked: why is that important to share? eeeeeeee it's not your funniest post
upsetting magic
my friend john (him again) and i were discussing really upsetting “is this your card?” magic tricks. I think this is important so here are a few we came up with:
** “Is this your card?” “No.” “Oh! You’re right! Its not your card, but IT IS a tiny photocopy of your mothers suicide note!”
** “Why, the ‘card’ you picked...
April 2013
11 posts
I went to Las Vegas this week and I’m happy to report that Lady Luck was very good to me. Ha, ha. No, I didn’t hit the jackpots or score a twenty-one. Nope. In fact, I didn’t win a penny.
All I did was finally realize that my life is worth living. I have great friends and family, good health, and twelve thousand copies of Top Gun on VHS locked in a storage warehouse in Studio City, California.
...
Hacker demonstrates how to hijack an airplane... →
theoriginaljackass:
This will keep me off commercial airplanes until at least Sunday.
The best comment found in response to this article. This person hates their boss SO MUCH.
i made this gif about work. its all real and true
March 2013
4 posts
February 2013
5 posts
WatchI love making up really stupid songs with Wade. I love working with Wade! Though I don’t think I’m a stupid little idiot. And Cash is a great guy. And everyone who ever helped us make this dumb show is great. And channel 101 is great even though im pretty sure everyone hates me! Please stop hating me! Please! I’m sick! I’m probably going to die soon! Please!
...
January 2013
3 posts
THE MEMOIRS OF MEREDITH PINN
30 years ago I killed my neighbor Jared. He had one of those trees in his yards that smelled like semen and he refused to cut it down. So I started a fire that burned everything.
I have never been caught.
I also give radical HJ’s
THE END.
December 2012
4 posts
A love letter to my best friends and to 2012, the...
I love Erin
ebtpearce:
Earlier tonight I had a good talk with my friend Will. He asked me how I got over my depression and since driving home I’ve had a lot to think about.
Sam’s not hear to talk to right now so you’re all gonna have to deal with this personal touchy feely post
I can honestly say that this has been the best year I’ve experienced so far as a human being on this Earth....
November 2012
5 posts
I was born 52 minutes before my twin sister Kelly. I remember in the womb pushing her out of the way, holding her back with my feet so I could be born first. My older brother says that I’m a liar- that I couldn’t possibly remember doing that. What does he know? He’s not as smart as I am. I was stronger and smarter than Kelly. Always was, always would be. It wasn’t her fault, but I never let her...
White Hot Harlots: Republicans love assholes. ... →
my brother wrote this. i like it
whitehotharlots:
In the wake of Romney’s defeat, conservative pundits have begun a GOP rebranding effort disingenuously packaged as soul-searching. Out of this pitiable mire there has arisen the following lie: Mitt Romney is a good and decent man, but he was out-campaigned by a superior politician. The Obama…
October 2012
7 posts
I found an old Teen Beat magazine in my closet with Blazer Thomas Jackson on the cover. Man, whatever happened to that guy? He was so dreamy with his squinty eyes, small button nose, thin lips… wait a minute! He wasn’t dreamy at all! He was a pretty good actor though. He was on that TV show Raising Fifteen where a single father juggles work at the office, having to go on dates, and raising fifteen...
When I was a kid I would make soup for monsters by throwing leaves and rocks and stuff in puddles. Only one monster ever showed up. His name was Ricky. I sometimes would record our conversations. Here’s the transcript from one I dug up a few nights ago.
Ricky: Hey, girl!
6 year old Me: Hey, Ricky! I made soup!
Ricky: Ugh… yeah, that again.
Me: You don’t like it?
Ricky: It’s fine, just sort...
ME: Great news! I’m not pregnant! The doctor said I just have a potpourri of infections down there. He also said I can’t get pregnant without having sex
MAN: Do I know you?
ME: I don’t think so. Do you want to know me?
MAN: No. I’d like to leave.
ME: Where are you going?
MAN: Lunch.
ME: Ooh. Is that an invitation?
MAN:...
female rat pack
In high school my four friends and I heard Frank Sinatra playing at the local Italian restaurant and we decided that we wanted to be a female version of the Rat Pack. My friend thought we should be The Mouse Pack because mice are cuter than rats. That stupid idea was shot down and we stayed The Female Rat Pack. We got really into it and even had T-shirts made that read “The Female Rat Pack.” None...
Watchfiwmaw:
Episode 7 of Free Ideas with Mike & Wade
Mike and Wade come up with some kick-ass Halloween costume ideas with the help of their first ever special guest, the inimitable and hilarious Kelsy Abbott.
This episode is brought to you by Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Listen above or download it here.
Don’t you guys wanna hear my obnoxious voice on wade and mikes funny podcast??!
September 2012
4 posts
INDIANA JONES
I used to love playing Indiana Jones. Have you heard of that game? I played it by running past my apartment’s parking gate while its closing. That’s what Indiana Jones did. He ran past gates and walls and stuff while they were closing. My parking gate closes really slowly though, so to make it more exciting I had a couple neighbor kids stand outside the gate and shoot BB’s at me while I tried to...
